Friday, April 16, 2010

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In Praise of Stay at Home Mom's

It was a year ago this month that I made the huge decision to be a Stay At Home Mom. It was a very tough decision for my husband and myself, but it was definitely the best decision I have ever made.

I worked for 8 months after my son was born. I had a job that I liked, I had co-workers that I loved, and an amazing boss. Who wouldn't want to stay? After about a week of being back at my normal schedule, I realized that I could not work full time and take care of my family at the same time. I brought this to my boss's attention and she was amazing enough to let me cut my hours to part time. So, for the next 8 months I worked Mon-Fri from 8am - noon and it was nice. I had my mom and mom-in-law splitting babysitting duties and I would pick Logan up straight after work then head home.

I was pregnant in this photo!

As great a deal as that was, it eventually started taking a toll on me and my family. I was so tired when I got home from work that I didn't want to do much, I ended up using the evenings and weekends to catch up on chores, and everything became a priority over my poor husband. I started having some what of an attitude problem at home because work started to become stress full for me. My amazing boss had been on maternity leave, and upper management starting making un wanted changes to our department while she was gone. This was no fun, and made me wonder why I was still there. Still loved my co-workers, but without our boss there defending us, was it really worth it? Bringing that stress home with me everyday was very hard on everyone around me. We had talked about me quitting, but I just didn't see how we would make it.

Then, as an early Easter gift last year, my mom bought me Dr. Laura's "In Praise of Stay at Home Mom's". I read this book, and would share what I've read with my husband. I noticed that as I was reading the book, I started looking at myself and my attitude from the outside in. My husband and I had a huge talk, went over a budget, and made the gut wrenching decision, I put in my two weeks notice. Before doing so I let my boss (who was on maternity leave) know via facebook. I didn't want her to be the last to know. She completely understood that I had to do this, and she remains to be a good friend of mine.

Me and my two bosses.

What's great about Dr. Laura's book is that it taught me what being a mom is really about. Staying home with them isn't just enough. She talks about spending time with them, teaching them, and how important it is to make time for yourself and also your husband. She talks about putting on the smiley face before your husband gets home because the last thing he needs to hear, while being the sole income, is what a stress full day you've had. Also, how important it is to show your appreciation for what he does, so I can stay home. She talks about how important it is to look good for your man when he comes home. Sometimes if I've been too busy to "pretty up" all day, I'll apply some makeup and do my hair just before he gets home.

Since reading this book, and becoming my son's mom, this home has been a happy one. Sometimes it's stress full to be home all day, or to not be able to do the fun expensive stuff others can do. It's totally worth it though, because I have the best job in the world. The pay is little, the hours are long, I'm always on call, and I get no sick days. But when my son wakes up in the morning and wraps his arms around me so tight, all is perfect. I love being able to see him grow up. I love spending time in the morning trying to teach him stuff, I love our morning workouts, I love our trips and adventures, and I love playing with him out front waiting for daddy to come home and the look on his face when he sees daddy rounding the corner. I don't have to miss any of that! I am truly blessed.

If you have not yet read "In Praise of Stay at Home Mom's" by Dr. Laura I highly recommend it. It is so well written and she knows exactly what to say to us mom's.

Happy 1 year anniversary to me!

Photo Credit: photo #1
all other photos: mine


The Blue Zoo said...

Im glad I get to be a SAHM. I have so many kids I literally cant afford to work anyways! LOL

Heather @ Gerber Days said...

I love staying home with my little pumpkin, and I'm SO glad that I can! I work part time in my at home salon, but it's so much better than leaving my munchkin with someone else all day. I'll have to read this book.

PS we have the SAME awesome jumper!

Lisa, An American Mom said...

Thanks for sharing! I feel the same way. I have thought about reading this book, maybe I will pick it up. Sometimes I need a little SAHM encouragement. :)

Jessica said...

That sounds like a very good book. I recently became a stay at home mom, not by choice, I was laid off. My kids are not younger but it is still hard to stay at home each day and be motivated to keep everything together.

JoeyRes said...

Stay at home moms can use the praise because I for one feel somewhat guilty about getting to be here for every moment of my daughter's life while my husband makes all of the money.

Erica Rubin Irish said...

Great post. I work part time from home, with a very flexible writer's schedule. I am so thankful for the time that I get to spend with my daughter, and for the hours that my husband puts in to make it possible.

KDC Events said...

What a great post! Thank you for your kind words =) and thank you for letting me borrow your book (which I am done with and ready to return). I love working with you, but I am going to love letting our little guys play even more! Your're a great mommy and wife, keep it up, you're a great inspiration.

Join the Gossip said...

All that matters is being happy. We only have one life and it's our responsibility to be happy! Glad that you are =)

ps...check out ,y spring exchange and sign up if you'd like!

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